THE DEPTH OF ADDICTION - S4 E14

THE DEPTH OF ADDICTION 

I slept off trying to fight off Ruka's thought with Ronke's fantasies. It was not easy. 

I woke up around 4:41am. It's saturday. All my family members were still sleeping; why won't they?

They have been through a lot during the week. I picked up my phone; checked the airtime on it. I have N156 on my phone. It's not much to make a long conversation. I tried getting back to sleep but I just can't. I drafted a message to Ruka.

" I'm not texting to beg you back (no). I'm just concerned about us. I'm very sure that neither of us had a good night rest (smiling). Ruka, I might have lied to get into your life but I never lied when I said I love you. I love you Ruka but it's too late for that now. Just find it in your heart to forgive me and I pray that you............"

I ended the text with a blank space. I wanted her to fill the space with her imagination. I forwarded the 3pages text message to her exactly 5:03am and it delivered almost immediately. I read the message again, trying to guess what was going through her head as I imagined her reading the text. I relaxed when I finished reading the text. I was not surprised when I saw her call rang on my phone. I picked with my heart in my mouth. 

Me: Good morning... how are you doing? 

Ruka: I saw your message.... I dint get the last part of the message.
Me: okay... has it gotten that bad that you no longer return my greetings?
Ruka: okay.... good morning.
Me: (smiling) morning... how was your night?
Ruka: it was fine... now answer my question?
Me: okay.... the message is meant for only you.... anything you fill in there.... is what it is.
Ruka: so you pray that I will find another person. Okay.... thank you very much Femi... thank you very much. 

Me: it's not what I meant.... what I meant was that "I prayed that one day, I hope... we will be happy together like every other day except today. 

Ruka: (voice calm) so what do you want from me? 

Me: to be frank with you.... I don't know. I just don't want to see you hurt like today again.
Ruka: (voice shaking) so you prefer her over me? I understand you very well. 

Me: it's not what you are thinking... I'm very sad about the whole issue. I just don't want such things to happen again.... (cuts me off)

Ruka: (crying) I bet it won't happen again.... just keep to yourself. Don't text me with blank messages. I thought you wanted to apologise but I can now see clearly that you have been playing me all along. You broke all the humanity inside of me. I told you about my past relationship but instead of you helping me get out of the cupboard: you betrayed my love and trust.

Me: (remorse voice) I'm really sorry for making you this sad. I will make it up to you, I promise.
Ruka: don't bother yourself.... you have already failed to fulfil your last promise... what makes you think you will be able to fulfil another one? 

Me: I....

Ruka: (cuts me off) Femi... you don't know what you want.... just leave me alone. I will get over it with time. You still have Bidemi to fall back on but what do I have? A broken heart... all thanks to you. (crying) Femi... go and meet your Bidemi. 

She terminated the call before I could say anything. I would have called her back but I don't have much airtime on the phone. 

She still felt bad about the issue. Why won't she? Bidemi has been a thorn in my flesh.
I don't want to beg without sorting out Bidemi's issue. How I got enslaved to Bidemi...Is still a mystery to me. I have had thoughts of letting Bidemi go but I just can't comprehends it with another lady filling her place. I wished the love I have for her... is not as strong as it is....

It's almost 6am... I have started hearing sound of movements in the house. I just have to arrange myself for the day. I don't have much airtime on the phone. I flashed Sarah and she called back.

Sarah: (smiling) good morning my dear. 

Me: (giggles) good morning love.... I had dreams about us together.

Sarah: (smiling) it seems you have started missing me already.

Me: yes.... I wish you were the one I'm meeting today not Adedoyin. 

Sarah: (chuckles) me too... but I don't want to jeopardise my chances with her. please just do it for me. I know how you feel.

Me: (feeling sad) I hope you do.... sleeping and pretending to love someone that you don't... it really hurts. 

Sarah: just do this for me okay... I don't want her to have any negativity in her helping me. Please Femi...

Me: I have made up my mind to see her.... don't worry. We will meet by 1pm today at Rooftop hotel. 

Sarah: she told me that... just try to make her happy and try to talk her about my proposal. I need all the help I can get, so that she would be indebted to help me. 

Me: (smiling) no problem.... I will try to chat her up on your behalf but please don't take my conversations with her personally. 

Sarah: what do you mean? 

Me: I know that she will definitely tell you what I told her and you will surely react about it.
Sarah: (smiling) don't bother yourself.... I will understand this time around. 

We talked for a while and she ended the call telling me that she would definitely miss me.
I can't wait for them to go for their business proposal at Abuja. I will definitely have time for girls within the same age bracket: Not women that would have passed for my mother. I entered the bathroom brushed my teeth and off to Funmilayo's room. I screamed her name from afar before opening the door. She is still sleeping. 

Me: wake up Iyawo mi...

Funmilayo: (yawning) ooh... Brother Femi... today's Saturday. The only time I get to sleep till 7:30am.

I woke her up and we did domestic chores together. I went to the kitchen, helped mum with the cooking. She was somehow surprised that I'm helping her out.

Mummy: this one that you are helping me in the kitchen. I hope you haven't done anything wrong? 

Me: (smiling) no oooo... I mean yes.... I'm going out to see one of my friends in afternoon and I don't want you to miss me when I'm gone.

Mummy: I don't know any of your friends except the Adeboye's. I hope he's not the one that got you drunk the other day.

Me: hanhan mummy... that's one of my mistakes I want to forget. 

Mummy: I'm sorry for bringing it up. So which of your friends are you going to see today? 

Me: (smiling) you are asking as if you know any of my friends... I'm going out to a friend. 

Mummy: not knowing any of your friends, does not mean that I won't check after you. 

We argued for awhile before she agreed to let me go out; only that I come back before 5pm. I rushed over to her and planted a surprise peck on her cheek. 

Me: (smiling) thanks mum... let me make an urgent call... love you (walking out of the kitchen)
Mummy: you are such a naughty boy...you'ved gotten what you wanted.

I dint reply her. I rushed over to my room and connected a call to Adedoyin. She picked.

Adedoyin: Good morning Femi 

Me: morning dear. How was your night? 

Adedoyin: never would have been better.. having it in mind that you have agreed seeing me today .
Me: (smiling) yes... I can't wait to see you too... my mum just gave me the go ahead but she insisted I come home before 5pm. 

Adedoyin: (smiling) that's very good... at least we will have 4 hours to ourselves.
Me: yes... I'm very happy when she said 5pm... but I have to hang up now because I promised to help her to do some things before 1pm. 

Sarah: okay dear... love you 

Me: love you too...

I terminated the call with the airtime on my phone remaining N30. I went to the bathroom for my bath. I ate my light breakfast... akara and pap. it's now some minutes to 12pm. The time looks slow. I had never used drug on Adedoyin before but I don't think I have the strength to last 4 hours. I rushed to Badoo's room.

He's not in his room. I rushed to his wardrobe ... picked a sachet of performance enhancer drug.